Erica and her husband suffered from secondary infertility, most easily described as infertility in a patient who has previously conceived. When they shared this diagnosis and decision to pursue infertility treatment with friends and family, they were a little surprised at their reactions.
“‘At least you have a son,'” people would say. “But for us, our family didn’t feel complete.”
Erica’s first pregnancy at 37 was conceived naturally and easy. She didn’t have much morning sickness and people described her as “glowing.” Her labor went well, with no complications. After this, she assumed that she would have the same experience the next time she got pregnant. When it didn’t happen, it was a shock.
Her family and friends were sympathetic. They tried their best to be supportive and look at the bright side. Words like “you should be happy with what God gave you” weren’t helping.
“Every couple is different, and while they have one or two children, they may still feel like their family is incomplete,” she explained. “It’s our choice to have the family we wanted.”
Erica, like many of her friends and family, is a woman of faith. While she disagreed with those who advised her to “put it in God’s hands,” she disagreed with how to put it in God’s hands. Neither were Erica or her husband ready to accept, as others advised, that maybe it was God’s will that she have only one child.
“The way I see it, God put science and medical research on the Earth for a reason,” she explained. “There are doctors and specialists so we can help ourselves.”
Erica thinks this time of reflection helped her realize that she wasn’t willing to keep trying to conceive naturally. She was ready to learn what other options were available, including using a donor egg.
“We came to terms that maybe we did need help. We owed it to ourselves to at least make an appointment and listen to what the doctor had to say,” she said. With the help of Dr. Potter, IVF and a donor egg, Erica became pregnant with their second child, a beautiful baby girl. She attributes Dr. Potter’s skill, knowledge and commitment to their success.
“He told me, ‘I know I can get you pregnant. Then, we are going to do everything in our power to keep you pregnant.'”
The couple is very glad they pursued fertility treatment.
“I think God put Dr. Potter in our path for a reason,” she said. “You have to have faith. Faith helped us and we prayed a lot. We had God on one side and Dr. Potter on the other side.”
Guest Blogger
HRC Fertility